Filed to story: Bound by Honor (Aria & Luca) Drama Story
Happy wasn’t a word I’d use to describe my birthing story but maybe I was just my usual bitchy self.
“Lily’s in the living room.”
I walked inside their house and found Lily on the sofa with little Flavio asleep on her. She didn’t wear makeup and her hair was pulled up in a messy bun that I was all too familiar with.
“Hey,” I said quietly, hoping not to wake Flavio. Isabella luckily didn’t mind the occasional background noise but I wasn’t sure if that was a baby thing or just an Isabella thing.
Lily gave me a tired smile. I leaned down and hugged her carefully. Flavio was bigger than Isabella and I wondered how Lily could have done the home birth. “You’re brave, squeezing him out of you at home.”
Lily peered down at him. “It was really peaceful. Maybe because it was my second child. And you did a car seat birth, Gianna. That’s brave.”
“It wasn’t planned.”
“Where is she?” Lily asked curiously, peering behind me.
“Oh, Matteo is carrying her because I still have trouble lifting her with the carrier. I’m sure he’ll bring her here as soon as he’s done chatting with Romero.”
Lily gave me a surprised look. “You don’t mind her being out of your sight? So shortly after birth, I can hardly stay away to go to the bathroom.”
I glanced toward the doorway where the low murmur of male voices could still be heard, wondering if I was being a bad mother because I had no trouble leaving her with Matteo. It wasn’t as if I was gone for hours, or even far away.
Lily touched my hand, tugging me down beside her. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. Mom guilt is the worst feeling in the world. I’m just being very clingy to the point where even Romero is hardly allowed to hold Flavio. My hormones are really bad this time.”
“I guess it was love at first sight for you?”
Lily pursed her lips, stroking Flavio’s dark hair. “No, it wasn’t. Not with Sara and not with Flavio either. It’s… I don’t know. Responsibility and protectiveness at first but in the days after birth, as we’re getting to know each other, it grows quickly to love.”
Matteo finally entered the living room with Isabella in her carrier. He set her down on the floor next to me and bent over Flavio. “Looks like Romero.”
Lily grinned. “He does.”
Sara ran into the room and climbed up beside Lily, leaning her head against her arm to peer at her brother.
“Romero and I want to take a look at his old Chevy,” Matteo said as a way of goodbye before he disappeared from view.
“He bought a classic car that he wants to restore,” Lily said with a shrug before she turned to Sara who was tugging at her hand. “Can we play?”
Lily bit her lip. “Not now, Sara. Your brother is sleeping. But later Mommy will make some time.”
“Okay,” Sara said, pouting.
“Why don’t you grab a book that I can read to you?” I asked.
Sara’s face lit up and she darted away, probably to her room.
“That’s my number one mom guilt point right now,” Lily admitted. “Sara wants even more attention than before but I don’t have as much time.”
“I’d have never thought you’d suffer from mom guilt at all. You seem like the perfect mother.”
Lily gave me a disbelieving look. “I doubt there’s a perfect mother.”
Isabella began to squirm and her eyes fluttered open, soon followed by the first mewls and hesitant cries. I picked her up, pressed her against my chest and kissed her temple. She smelled so impossibly good, even though I couldn’t even define the scent.
“What’s up, Isa? Hungry again?”
She peered up at me. Her eyes were still that strange murky blue and I wondered if they’d darken or turn lighter. I grabbed her small blanket, draped it over me and started nursing her. At night Matteo and I both fed her. Luckily she took both the bottle and my breast, making our life so much easier.
When I looked up, Lily was smiling emotionally, her eyes glistening.
“Don’t tell me seeing me as a milk source makes you want to cry?” I asked with a soft laugh.
Lily shrugged. “It does. I never thought you and I would ever sit on a sofa with our babies together.”
“Me neither, trust me. This wasn’t part of the plan.”
“But you’re happy?”
I listened to Isa’s smacking, trying to determine my feelings. “I’m not unhappy. I love her and would never give her away. She’s mine, but it’s not my dream life. I miss working out, I miss working, and drinking a glass of wine and dancing and… sex.”
Lily laughed. “Sex is the farthest thing on my mind right now.”
“Well, it’s not like I’m close to being in the mood right now. I’d probably strangle Matteo if he made a move right now, but still.”