Filed to story: Reclaimed Book by Roxie Ray
“It’s hard for me to open up to someone in that way,” I admitted. “Even someone like Steph. I’ve been on my own basically my whole life, you know. Especially with my mom being so…”
Mia rested a hand on my forearm in understanding. The only other person in my life who was supposed to love me unconditionally, my mother, had proven that love was, in fact, quite conditional, and always came in second place to her one true love: alcohol. That still hurt me, and I still struggled to really believe that Steph would always put me first. That he wanted to put me first. I was afraid if I let him claim me, one day he’d decide I wasn’t enough for him and he’d leave me-like my mother had, like everyone had. And it would be even more painful because we’d be bonded. Because I loved him.
But Steph wouldn’t do that. He promised me he wouldn’t leave me. And he never really had betrayed me, no matter how many times the world tried to pull us apart. He always came back.
I was ready to stop letting my fear control me.
“I’m scared. I think I’ll always be scared about letting Steph claim me, but I think I’m ready, Mia.”
“Honestly, I’d be worried if you weren’t scared,” Mia said. “It’s a big deal for dragons, and even bigger for humans. But I think it’s the right thing. The right next step.”
“Me too,” I said softly. “Thanks, Mia.”
“For what?” she asked with a smile.
“For everything. Listening. Being here.” That made the tears that had threatened to spill earlier fall down my cheeks. I laughed, embarrassed and quickly wiped them away.
“Aw, Harley.” Mia pulled me into a tight hug. “Girl, you’re my sister now. I’m here for you no matter what.”
I hugged her back. “Still. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Now, let’s see what our kids are getting into out there. If Zoey’s swimming in the lake again, I’m going to flip out.”
As it turned out, Zoey had gotten in the lake and was shaking the water off on the kids.
The rest of the afternoon was a lot more relaxed. Dylan gave Zoey a bath while Cassidy supervised, I played with Bella, and Mia and Striker made lunch as well and pre-prepped meals to freeze. Since it looked like I was going to be stuck in this house for God only knew how long, I was grateful for the company and the support. When Steph texted mid-afternoon and said he wouldn’t be back until late, my heart sank, but I knew whatever he was doing was important.
When the sun set, Mia took Bella and Zoey home. The night dragged on. Cassidy and I had dinner, watched a movie, and eventually Dylan and Cassidy went to bed. Striker was in one of the guest rooms, and two more guys were outside the house for extra protection. Even with all these people around me, ensuring my safety and well-being, I couldn’t help but feel alone.
There was no way I’d be able to sleep until Steph got home, so I curled up on the couch with a book and a glass of wine. Even that didn’t help distract me from worrying about Steph.
It was nearly midnight when the door finally opened.
Steph looked exhausted.
There were dark circles under his eyes, and a furrow so deep between his brows I could see the permanent wrinkles already forming. “You’re awake,” he said in surprise.
“I missed you.” I put my wine glass on the coffee table and closed my book. “I wanted to see you.”
“Missed you too. I’m really tired, though, Harley?-“
“Hey.” I stood up and crossed the living room, then cupped his face in both hands. “Let me take care of you.”
He tipped his head to the side slightly, looking more like a confused puppy than an alpha dragon. Something about that gesture made my heart break a little. Steph spent so much time protecting the clan and everyone in it. When was the last time someone had taken care of him? Even if someone had tried, I’m sure he wouldn’t have been comfortable with it. I had a feeling, however, that it’d be different with me, his mate.
I took his hand and led him upstairs to the en suite bathroom in our bedroom.
I slowly peeled off my clothes, then Steph’s. His hands fell to my waist, and he pulled me in for a kiss. There was passion in it but no urgency, no intense hunger like there often was. In this moment, we both craved closeness and intimacy. I turned the shower on, and once it was warm, I tugged him under the spray.
He sighed in quiet relief as the water pounded on his shoulders and closed his eyes as I worked shampoo and then a bit of my conditioner through his hair. I washed his body next, moving slowly over his shoulders, arms, and muscular torso. I mapped his skin with my touch, tracing the dark ink of his tattoos, then turning him around to do the same to his broad back. When I pushed my thumbs into his shoulder blades, he groaned in pleasure and tipped his head forward.
“You need a real massage,” I said, then kissed the top of his spine.
“I’m fine,” he mumbled.
“I bet your dragon needs one too.”
He shivered, then turned around and pulled me into his arms. Under the warm water, he kissed me on my lips, cheeks, and neck.
“Let me do your beard,” I said, laughing.
“Too rough for you?”
“Mm, no, it feels good, but you seriously need a shape-up.”
I pulled him out of the shower, dried off briskly, then put on one of the plush cotton robes hanging on the towel hook. Steph had a towel around his waist, and beads of water rolled down his muscled chest. Part of me wanted to lick it off, but tonight wasn’t about that.
I picked up his razor, then his shaving cream. He tilted his head to the side, and I applied the shaving cream to his neck.
“I know this has been a lot for you,” I said. “Everything with me, and Blakely, and Sean, and now Forrest. I don’t want you to feel like you have to carry this alone. You can talk to me about anything, Steph.”
“You’re dealing with enough?-“
“We’re both dealing with this. Together.”
Steph’s eyes fluttered closed as I carefully ran the razor up his neck to his jaw. I guided his head, carefully tipping him where I needed him to go to shave the last of the stubble from his neck. When I was done, I wiped his skin with a washcloth, then followed it with the woodsy aftershave I loved so much. Then, I finished by adding his beard oil to my palms, and then smoothing it through his beard until it was soft and shining.
“That’s better,” I said. “You look like a human again. Or a dragon, I guess.”
“Thank you.” His eyes fluttered open, and I saw they were flecked with gold. He took both hands in mine and smoothed his thumbs over my knuckles. “Go on a walk with me?”
“Right now?”
It was just past midnight, and everyone else in the house was silent and asleep. And I was pretty cozy in my big robe.
“Right now,” he said with a small smile. “It’s a full moon tonight. We could go out to our spot.” The corners of his lips turned down slightly. “I need the fresh air.”
Maybe his dragon was craving the cool air, the moonlight, the sound of the rustling leaves. Maybe that was what he needed to open up to me. “Actually, that sounds nice.”
We dressed in clothes that were more like pajamas: comfy sweatpants and one of Steph’s old Cole’s Garage sweatshirts for me. He wore sweatpants and a white tank-top. He looked sexy all dressed down and relaxed. It was like he was a totally different man-one unburdened from all the issues we were dealing with.
I peered into Dylan’s room as we passed it. He was fast asleep, face smushed into his pillow and one leg sticking out from under the covers. Steph peeked over my head and huffed a small laugh at the sight. He sent a quick text to Rome, who was on watch outside, to let him know we were walking the grounds.
Satisfied that Dylan wouldn’t wake up and the house was still safe, the two of us went outside.
Steph intertwined his fingers with mine. He carried a folded blanket under his other arm. The night air was cool and refreshing, and the lake’s still surface reflected the full moon. The wind rustled gently through the trees, and an owl called from somewhere in the darkness.
We walked down the familiar trail toward the clearing I’d first visited with him when I was eighteen. We were deep into the forest before Steph spoke.
“Did I ever tell you my dad made this trail?”
“You didn’t.” I squeezed his hand, encouraging him to continue.
“He did it for my mother when she first got sick. They’d walk all around the lake together. When she was no longer able to walk, he’d push her in her wheelchair, so she never had to spend too much time away from nature.” He looked up to the sky and the moonlight shined on his face. “When she passed away, Dad and I would walk this trail together. I think that’s when he began to think about his heir and the future of the clan. He started having more conversations with me about what it meant to be the alpha. He saw something in me that he didn’t see in Sean.”
