Filed to story: The One That Got Away
He eyes me and then says, “You wear more make-up than Genevivian did.”
I shrink back like he slapped me. All I’m wearing is mascara! And a little lip gloss! I know for a fact that Genevivian wears bronzer and eye shadow and concealer every day. Plus mascara and eyeliner and lipstick!
Swiftly Louis says, “Shut up, Owen.”
Owen’s snickering. I narrow my eyes. This kid is only a few years older than Kitty! I lean forward and wave my hand in front of my face. “This is all natural. But thank you for the compliment, Owen.”
“You’re welcome,” he says, just like his big brother.
On the drive home, I say, “Hey, Louis?”
“What?”
“Never mind.”
“What? Just ask.”
“Well … your parents are divorced, right?”
“Yup.”
“So how often do you see your dad?”
“Not often.”
“Oh, OK. I was just wondering.”
Louis looks over at me with expectant eyes.
“What?” I say.
“I’m just waiting for the next question. You never just have one question.”
“Well, do you miss him?”
“Who?”
“Your dad!”
“Oh. I don’t know. I think it’s more that I miss how it used to be with us. Him and my mom and me and Owen. We were like a team. He used to come to every lacrosse game.” Louis gets quiet. “He just … took care of things.”
“I guess that’s what dads do.”
“That’s what he’s doing for his new family.” Louis says it matter-of-factly, without bitterness. “What about you? You miss your mom?”
“Sometimes, when I think about it.” Suddenly I say, “You know what I miss? I miss bath time. I miss when she would wash my hair. Don’t you think getting your hair washed is just the best feeling? Like, warm water and bubbles and fingers in your hair. It’s so nice.”
“Yeah, it is.”
“Sometimes I don’t think about her at all, and then … and then sometimes I’ll have a thought like, I wonder what she would think of me now? She only knew me as a little girl, and now I’m a teenager, and I wonder, if she saw me on the street, would she recognize me?”
“Of course she would. She’s your mom.”
“I know, but I’ve changed a lot.” An uncomfortable look has crossed his face, and I can tell he’s regretting complaining about his dad, because at least his dad is still alive. And then, because Louis’s looking at me like he feels sorry for me, I straighten up and say in a haughty voice, “I’m very mature, you know.”
He’s grinning now. “Oh yeah?”
“Oh, yes, I’m very refined, Louis.”
When Louis drops me off, right before I get out of the car, he says, “I can tell my mom liked you.” This makes me feel good inside. It’s always been really important to me that other people’s moms like me.
It was my favourite part of going over to Genevivian’s house – hanging out with her mom. Wendy was so stylish. She used to wear a silky blouse and nice pants and a statement necklace, just for sitting around the house. Perfect hair, always smooth and flat. Genevivian has that same good hair, but she doesn’t have her mom’s perfect straight nose. Hers has a little bump on the bridge that I think only adds to her appeal.
“By the way, you definitely don’t wear more make-up than Gen. She was always getting bronzer on my white shirts.”
For someone who’s over Genevivian, he sure does talk about her a lot. Though it’s not just him. I was thinking about her too. Even when she’s not here, she’s here. That girl has some kind of reach.
During chemistry, Louis writes me a note that says, Can I come over tonight to study for the test?
I write back, I don’t remember study sessions being in the contract. After he reads it, he turns around and gives me a wounded look. I mouth, I’m kidding!
At dinner I announce that Louis’s coming over to study and we’re going to need the kitchen, and my dad raises his eyebrows. “Leave the door open,” he jokes. We don’t even have a door to the kitchen.
“Daddy,” I groan, and Kitty groans with me.
Casually he asks, “Is Louis your boyfriend?”
“Um … something like that,” I say.
After we eat and Kitty and I do the dishes, I set up the kitchen like a study room. My textbook and notes are stacked up in the centre of the table, with a row of highlighters in blue, yellow and pink, a bowl of microwave kettle corn, and a plate of peanut-butter brownies I baked this afternoon. I let Kitty have two but that’s it.
He said he’d be over around eight. At first I think he’s just late as usual, but the minutes tick by and I realize he’s not coming. I text him once but he doesn’t text back.