Filed to story: The Alpha’s Pen Pal Book
I shift in my spot on the couch, setting the blanket aside, closing my notebook, and placing my hand on his leg, giving it a squeeze to let him know I am there, and I understand. My movements jolt him out of his trance, and he turns his head, his eyes meeting mine.
“Thank you,” I say, my gaze locked with his. “This was very helpful.”
He nods but says nothing. His hands clasp together, his jaw ticks, and he’s breathing harder than normal, but he just stares at me.
I stand and slip my feet back into my shoes, reaching for the heel to pull them on. “I should get going since the video is done,” I say, picking up the notebook, hugging it to my chest, and moving towards the door.
“Or we could watch an actual movie? Now that training is over?”
I bite my lip as I turn to look at him, at the smile that is back on his face and the tiny glint that’s returned to his eyes.
There he is. The male I’m used to is back, breaking through like the rays of the sun after a thunderstorm. Although it’s nice to know there is more to him than the happy-go-lucky cookie-loving jokester, I’ve grown attached and addicted to his goofiness, to his smile and his laugh. My wolf wags her tail, and there’s no doubt in my mind what my choice should be.
“Sure. Why not?” I shrug, bouncing back to him before I can change my mind. Not that I would have.
I take my shoes off again and sit down beside him, wrapping his cozy blanket embedded with his comforting, Christmassy scent around me, settling in with him for a real movie night.
REIDSunlight teases and dances behind my eyelids, tempting them to open, but I squeeze them shut tighter. Warmth surrounds me. My body is relaxed and at ease, more rested than I’ve been in weeks. Or maybe ever.
I adjust my body, settling further into the plush, soothing warmth, wrapping my arms tighter around the body snuggled on top of me.
My eyes snap open, and my chin tilts down until Taryn fills my field of vision. Taryn, curled up on my chest, my blanket tucked around her body, her eyes shut, and her breathing deep and even, a small smile on her face in her sleep.
I hold my breath and don’t move a muscle, too afraid to wake her up. Because when she wakes up, the magic of this moment will disappear, the spell broken, and she’ll leave my arms, taking her warmth, light, and scent with her. And because I am selfish, I want to steal any moment with her I can, even though she can’t feel our bond yet. My wolf is calm and settled, pleased we spent the night with Taryn in our arms and against our body.
Taryn stretches, her neck arching up and a sleepy, content moan leaving her mouth. I bite back a groan, my eyes squeezing shut as I fight my instincts and desires and focus on something other than her body moving on top of mine.
She tucks my blanket under her chin, her hand coming to rest between her cheek and my chest, right above my heart. Then she relaxes again, her heart rate and breaths slowing further as she falls into a deeper sleep.
I let out my held breath, relaxing with her, my hand rubbing her back in time with her inhales and exhales. The TV is off. The power save feature must have kicked in after our second movie ended since we both fell asleep, and the early morning light peeks in around the curtains. The snacks are almost all gone—we ate quite a bit throughout our afternoon and evening together—but the dishes remain.
The clock on the wall reads 7:30 a.m., which is later than I’m used to waking, but it’s Saturday, so it doesn’t matter. My only plans for today are training Taryn, and since she’s already here, since we had an accidental sleepover, we can move that training to a bit earlier.
Or… or I can let her sleep longer. I can fall back asleep with her. We can snuggle and sleep in for as long as our bodies need, then have breakfast together, hang out around the packhouse, and train whenever we’re ready to. She may not know we’re mates, but some subconscious part of her must recognize what I am to her if she’s this relaxed while sleeping in my arms and on my chest.
I pull her tighter against me, adjusting our bodies until my lips brush the top of her head and her hair tickles my nose, the coconut scent of her products blending with her natural peony, strawberry, and peach scent like a summery fruit salad. “I wish I knew why you don’t feel what I feel,” I say into her hair. “It’s not fair, and it doesn’t make sense.”
I stroke her back again, down to right above her cute little butt and up to the base of her neck, careful to not touch her hair. My hand cups the back of her neck, my thumb sliding back and forth, and I swallow against the growing tightness in my throat.
“Honestly, it’s probably better this way. I’d never have gotten to know you otherwise. Or seen who you are on the inside. I’d never have accepted my feelings for you.”
My thumb stills and my lips press into her hair—not quite a kiss, because I can’t bring myself to cross that line when she’s unaware of any of this, but as close as I can get to one until she knows we’re meant to be together.
“I’m going to show you I can be the male you need me to be. I’m going to prove it to you. Even though I’m terrified as hell of losing you later, even though I know firsthand what that can do to someone—I’m more terrified of never having you.”
I close my eyes, the itching in them too much to handle. “I know you’re going to be angrier than a goat on fire when you find out the truth, but I have to do it this way. I need to find out what’s going on first, and I want you to fall for me like I’ve fallen for you. I want to make you fall in love with me because—although I’m no expert and will never claim to be one—I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with you.”
My voice breaks, and I tilt my chin up to the ceiling, breathing in and out to stem the swelling wave inside me. All of it is unfamiliar—it’s everything I’ve pushed down again and again, year after year and moment after moment. It stretches and reaches, attempting to escape, but I clench my jaw and tense my body, pushing it down, forcing it back into the depths of my damaged soul, the soul that doesn’t deserve her but will try to earn her anyway.
“Oh,
fuck.”
My eyes blink open, and Taryn leaps off me, cowering in the opposite corner of the couch, my blanket wrapped around her. She takes the warmth and comfort with her, leaving me empty and aching, cold and lost without her touching me.
My instinct is to reach for her, to grab her and tug her back on top of me so we can continue our snuggling, but her wide-eyed gaze and her pounding heart stop me.
I glance at the clock. 10 a.m. Which means I fell asleep again after I whispered my promises to her. Two and a half more hours of glorious sleep with Taryn in my arms.
And now it’s over.
I groan and rub my hand over my face, rolling onto my side and sitting up, throwing my legs over the edge of the couch. I scratch my neck and glance at her again, still sitting there wide-eyed, staring at me.
“I guess we fell asleep while watching Top Gun,” I say, flashing her a smile.
She swallows and licks her lips, leaning forward and glancing around like she’s about to tell me a deep, dark secret. “We had a sleepover.” I nod. “That’s like… one of your rules, isn’t it? No sleepovers?”
My stomach clenches and my palms sweat. She’s not wrong, but my rules don’t matter anymore. They haven’t mattered since I decided I wanted her as my mate. If I’m honest, they haven’t mattered since I walked into that restaurant a week ago and saw her sitting there, waiting for me.
Because the mate bond has no rules.
“It’s fine,” I murmur, running my hand through my hair and avoiding her eyes.
“But—“
“It’s really not a big deal,” I say, shrugging.
She presses her lips together and nods, her movements tentative. “Right.” She draws the word out, reaching up to fix her head wrap. “Right. Because we’re not sleeping together. I mean, we slept together, but we didn’t sleep together.”
I laugh and shake my head, my elbows on my knees and my chin dropping to my chest. She chuckles too, a soft smile on her lips.
“I’m sorry I climbed on top of you,” she says. “I must have gotten cold or something.”
New Book: Veiled Desires of the Alpha King Novel
Dayson was the alpha of the largest pack in North America. Powerful figures from other packs sought to offer gorgeous girls as potential mates for Dayson. He steadfastly rejected these advances, he was not a pawn to be manipulated. But eventually there came a mysterious girl he could hardly say No. Who was she?