Filed to story: Luna Lovette and Alpha Kodak Story
“You look like a corpse.”
“I’ll be fine. Just plonk me on that monstrosity of a sofa and let me have a twenty minute nap and I’ll be just as lively as I was before.” She wouldn’t have even needed the nap if Kodak hadn’t had so many bruises and wounds. “Just a little power nap and I’ll be fine.”
Kodak couldn’t help smiling at the way she curled up on the bulky sofa in a fetal position five minutes later. She looked even tinier than usual, but still not fragile. There was too much steel in her for that.
“Ryan just called,” Tao informed him. “They’ve gone.”
Kodak nodded and then watched in surprise as some of his pack gathered around her. Dante, Grace and Rhett sat on her left while Lydia, Marcus and Cam sat on her right. Trick, Dominic and Tao then all sat on the floor with the back of their heads resting against her legs. It was a gesture of support, comfort and acceptance as well as an indication that they intended to guard her as she slept. She had earned the respect of each of them in the short time that she had been here.
A strange pang struck his chest – unfamiliar and unnerving. “I’m going to take a shower. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” They nodded but were focused on Lovette who had gone out like a light. He and his wolf were comforted by the knowledge that they would stay with her while Kodak removed the streaks of blood and the lingering scent of the dead wolf from his body. The dead wolf who was now no longer a threat to his mate or their mating.
It was as Kodak was showering that he thought back to how he had felt when, forced to be nothing but an observer, he saw Lovette tentatively trying to gain his wolf’s attention. The anger, the frustration and the anxiety rushed back. There had been something else in that cocktail of emotions. Fear. Kodak had actually felt fear.
It wasn’t that he hadn’t experienced that emotion before. Of course he had. Having an underdeveloped conscience and an explosive temper didn’t mean he didn’t know fear. What was bothering him right now was that he had felt such fear for Lovette, had feared she would be seriously hurt and feared she would be taken from him just like that – and at his own hands. He couldn’t even say it was his wolf’s fear. His wolf had been going through his own shit right then. No, that had been all
Kodak.
It had to have been a direct consequence of the natural crazy-possessiveness and crazy-protectiveness that came with mating. It was obviously age-old instincts pushing to the forefront, taking over. Kodak understood that the mating would be temporary, but his instincts to protect his mate were obviously going to override his thoughts. Obviously. Just like his instinct to mark his mate and make her submit to him had overridden his true indifference to those things.
Yeah, that was all it was, all it could be. Obviously. That didn’t improve his mood any because there was another issue that was bothering him. Lovette shouldn’t have been able to calm his wolf.
When a wolf shifter went into feral mode they behaved a lot like a rabid animal. They attacked senselessly, they felt no emotional attachments, they lost all sense of reason and logic. And yet her scent and voice had reached his wolf even through that fog.
Kodak had felt how quickly his wolf had recognised her as his mate, how quickly he had switched from wanting to kill to wanting to protect. The only reason his wolf had been reluctant to leave the carcass was because he still hadn’t been stable enough to understand that the sandy wolf was dead and no longer a danger to Lovette.
If his wolf was this attached to Lovette now, what would he be like in three months? What would happen when she left? Kodak’s wolf growled his objection, confirming Kodak’s suspicion that his eventual separation from her could be more problematic and uncomfortable than he had anticipated even though they hadn’t imprinted.
Unlike with true mates, a relationship between imprinted mates could wither over time. For an unhappy imprinted couple it wasn’t simple for them to shake hands and go their separate ways because of the metaphysical bond that existed between them. The pain of that kind of separation was on a psychic level just as much as a physical one.
For most wolves, it meant constant migraines, a lingering sense of emptiness, and slipping in and out of depressive states for a few years, if not longer. Some wolves even retreated within their human half completely, unable to function without their mate. The worst case scenario for any wolf separated from their mate was that they turned rogue, remaining in wolf form and turning completely feral, attacking anyone they came into contact with – like his mother had.
After his dad had banished him, his mom – who had been a submissive wolf – had for the first time in her life rebelled against his dad’s authority. When he refused to reconsider his banishment, she had left with Kodak and the others, believing that she would cope with the separation because her bond with his father had been through imprinting as opposed to them being true mates. However the separation had proven too difficult for her, most likely because she had been a submissive wolf. Within six months she had turned rogue…and Kodak had been the one to kill her.
There was no way that he was prepared to go through something like that again. As long as he and Lovette didn’t imprint, there was no risk of either of them suffering any of those effects when they separated, but it was obvious that his wolf was already becoming attached to her. And that spooked the hell out of Kodak. So instead of going straight to Lovette to check on her like he wanted to, he shut himself in his office.
Another thing that spooked him was the knowledge that if she hadn’t been with him in that Mediation meeting, if she hadn’t kept him calm with her touch, he would have most definitely lost it and went for Darryl’s throat. Never had he been able to truly rely on another person. Never had there been someone for him to draw strength from. But that had been okay because he hadn’t wanted to need anyone. He hadn’t been the type of kid who craved physical affection – which had been a damn good thing since he’d never gotten it.
He had always prided himself on not having that weakness of needing anyone or anything. Having a mate, having a connection that came with mating, was fucking with that. Not that he believed for even one minute that the mating connection could override the way he functioned and had always functioned, but he didn’t have any interest in encouraging the cravings for his mate by feeding them.
Maybe if he distanced himself from her, spent little time with her, didn’t touch her, it would ease the matter and ease his wolf’s attachment to her. He needed to ignore these urges he had to be with her, to touch her, to mark her entire body, to ensure his scent was all over her. Those urges had nothing to do with Lovette as a person and everything to do with the fact that she was who he had mated. If she had been someone else, things would still have been the same.
Would they really though? a voice in his head questioned, a part of him who thought he was talking out of his ass.
Of course it would. That wasn’t to say that he didn’t like Lovette. He did. And he respected her which said a lot. And yeah, okay, there was that weird thing between them, that primal hunger. And she made him laugh, and she was refreshing because she wasn’t afraid of him or to speak her mind in front of him, and she –
Dammit, no! No, the attraction was mostly just due to their mating. It was just his instincts driving him, not his regard for Lovette. Kodak wasn’t at the mercy of those instincts or his wolf. He had a mind of his own and that mind was going to rule how he behaved from here on out.
Unless the situation required him to touch her – like when they were posing as mates – he would resist doing so. It would probably be best not to have sex with her again given that he could never resist the urge to mark her whenever he was inside her, but he couldn’t guarantee that sex wouldn’t happen because if she made advances he very much doubted he’d be able to ignore them.
To satisfy his overprotectiveness he would allocate her a bodyguard. No his wolf wouldn’t like her spending large amounts of time with another male, but his wolf would just have to deal with it because Kodak was going to get a handle on this situation and he was going to start now.
Lovette jerked awake at the sound of laughing. Three heads that had been leaning against her legs swerved around.
“Oh sorry,” said Tao, “it’s just that this episode of Friends is hilarious.”
“They’re all hilarious,” she mumbled as she sat upright. Trick and Tao each scooted over a little so that she had room to stretch her legs out.
“How are you feeling?” asked a voice to her right as a finger trailed down her cheek.
She looked up to see Grace. “Fine, thanks.” It was only then that she realized that they were all gathered around her. She understood what this meant. Not only had they been offering her comfort, they accepted her as a member of the pack.
Temporary member of the pack, she reminded herself.
“You look better,” said Tao.
“How long was I out?” she asked no one in particular as she stretched her arms which were a little stiff from her fetal position.
New Book: Veiled Desires of the Alpha King Novel
Dayson was the alpha of the largest pack in North America. Powerful figures from other packs sought to offer gorgeous girls as potential mates for Dayson. He steadfastly rejected these advances, he was not a pawn to be manipulated. But eventually there came a mysterious girl he could hardly say No. Who was she?