Filed to story: Bound by Honor (Aria & Luca) Drama Story
My smile became shakier. Even my sister thought I’d have a freak-out because of her kid and wanted to keep it away from me. Nobody would ever consider me motherly or anything close to it. And here I was, pregnant. “Don’t worry,” I pressed out.
Aria threw me another questioning look.
I was usually better at keeping up appearances but the current situation made my walls crumble.
Matteo took my hand again and squeezed. His eyes sent a clear message “
Do you want to leave?”
“Hey princess, how is it on the boys’ front?” I asked Marcella, giving her a cheeky smile. I wouldn’t run off from my family with my tail between my legs.
Marcella rolled her eyes in the direction of Luca who’d entered the living room with Romero at his side. “No boys.”
“They are scared of me!” Amo declared. I raised my eyebrows. He was tall for a five-year-old but I had a feeling Luca’s towering frame and his psychotic mafia killer reputation had more to do with the boys staying away.
I relaxed. This was familiar.
Romero gave me another warm smile before he joined Lily who’d set down Sara by now. He embraced her and a secretive look passed between them.
“What?” Aria asked at once. She’d noticed it too.
Lily laughed uncertainly, biting her lip, looking at Romero for some kind of sign. He shrugged. They smiled at each other and then Romero put his hand on Lily’s flat belly.
I froze.
Aria’s eyes grew wide, delight spreading on her beautiful face. “You’re pregnant?”
Lily nodded. “But it’s only six weeks.”
Matteo looked at me and squeezed my hand again but I didn’t react. I was in my fifth week if the pregnancy app was correct. My sister and I were both pregnant but our reactions couldn’t have been more different. Aria rushed toward Lily and hugged her carefully, then Romero. Luca slanted Matteo and me a suspicious look before he too congratulated them. Matteo tugged at my hand. “Come on, Gianna.”
I let him pull me toward my little sister, embraced and congratulated her on autopilot, pretended to be happy. Deep down I was happy for her but having her own joy thrown at me when I felt devastated for the very same reason… I couldn’t bear it.
I excused myself to the restrooms and sat down on the closed lid. For a long time, I only stared down at my feet in my favorite sandals, at my toe with the gold and diamond skull ring that Matteo had gifted me this morning, at the small tattoo on the arch of my foot: a Sanskrit symbol meaning breathe. I’d gotten the inspiration for it during my yoga teacher training. Breathing came naturally from birth to death, but right now my lungs seemed weighted down by lead.
A soft knock sounded. Too soft to be Matteo.
I steeled myself before I opened the door to Aria’s worried face. “Are you okay?”
“I’ve been feeling off these last few days. Maybe I’m coming down with something,” I lied.
“Do you want me to make you tea?”
I shook my head. “I’ll drink a few glasses of water to feel hydrated.”
The rest of the family had gathered on the terrace, chatting and drinking wine. Matteo’s gaze sought me at once, his eyes filled with concern. I gave him a firm smile and joined them outside. Luca held out a glass with white wine to me but I shook my head.
“Headache. I need to drink water first.”
Lily pointed at her glass. “Do you want some of my homemade iced tea. With Rooibos, not black tea though.”
“Sure,” I said and accepted a glass. We clinked glasses and I sipped at my iced tea. Only a few days until the appointment but I couldn’t bring myself to drink alcohol, as if it mattered what I did. Matteo snuck his arm around my waist, pulling me against him.
Luca and Aria occasionally threw us curious glances. They knew us too well. I talked to Aria about pretty much everything but this was a topic I couldn’t bring up with her, with my sister who loved her children more than life itself, whose motherly nature amazed me every day.
“I love that we’re doing this every year,” Lily said. We’d celebrated my birthday in the Hamptons every year in the last eight years because it was perfect out here in August.
“Next year, we’ll be one more!” Aria said with a huge smile.
One more. She was right. In one year, Lily would carry a newborn in her arms, looking exhausted but deliriously happy. And I? I’d be the same I had been the previous years, the cool aunt.
Even as I wished for that outcome, I knew I’d never be the version of me I’d been before. This pregnancy had already changed me.
Chapter Three
Matteo
I tousled Amo’s hair. “Hey!” he shouted indignantly and dashed off. Not quite six and already a huge personality. That boy would be a strong Capo one day.
“He’s getting as vain as you are,” Luca muttered with a shake of his head.
I sank down on the sofa in the living room. The women and kids were outside at the pool, and Romero had a call with one of his soldiers.