Filed to story: Love on the Sidelines (Natalie & Karl)
Maybe he wasn’t mad, but I had upset him. His eyes had gone from gray to molten and his body was tensed. “The only reason I asked was because I figured she could use the money.”
He didn’t answer.
“I’m sorry.”
A sigh lifted his chest and he looked up at me. “It’s not your fault. I just don’t want to talk about it, okay?”
“Okay.”
It was years before I realized he was embarrassed by what his father did, that he hated watching Liz Swanner’s tired acceptance when his father pulled her into the bedroom. Even worse for Karl was listening tothesoundscomingfromthatroom, 31 knowing all her kids were listening, too. If it hadn’t been for Lindsey, he never would have set foot on the place.
Liz wasn’t the only woman Frank used, she was simply the closest. Karl told me once that his father thought nothing of bringing home some two-bit hooker he’d found and taking her, knowing Karl could see everything he did because there was no door on the bedroom in the trailer. When Karl was old enough, he would leave the second his father showed up with a woman, sometimes spending the entire night huddled in the cold tin building that served as an office for the salvage yard. So Karl learned the facts of life earlier than most and in a particularly ugly way, a way that affected most of his teenage years. While other boys his age spent ninety-eight percent of their time figuring out how to get girls into bed, Karl avoided them like the plague, something that was destined to cause a real rift in our friendship when I hit puberty. But ignorance is bliss, and for right then, I was happy. Especially after I discovered that while I was vowing to save Karl, he had taken on the job of being my protector and staunchest defender. The incident that enlightened me occurred right before Christmas.
The fourth grade class at Morganville School didn’t have the luxury of individual desks. The students were assigned seats at numerous long tables designed to hold four people, two on each side. It was my misfortune to share my side of the table with Mooney Orr.
Mooney was the class bully, a boy who had already failed two grades by the time he landed in mine. He was fat, sweaty and loud, and all the kids were scared of him.
With good reason. If Mooney wanted something he took it, and woe to the child who tried to stop him. But Mooney was also crafty and sly. He never retaliated when an adult was near, preferring to ambush his prey when he could catch them off-guard, knowing it would be his word against the victims if the kid were stupid enough to tell.
Sitting next to him was torture. I always carried extra pencils because I knew Mooney would confiscate the one I was using. And I considered myself lucky that pencils were all he’d taken so far. At least, I was lucky until the week before our midterm tests.
Because the weather was nasty that Monday, our recess was taken in the gym. I was sitting on the bleachers taking a breather, watching Jenna chase Hugh in a game of tag, when Mooney confronted me.
“You’re gonna let me copy off your paper when we take our tests next week,” he said. “If you don’t, I’ll stomp you into the ground.” He swaggered off, secure in the thought that I’d comply with his demand. I watched him in shock. Cheat? He wanted me to cheat on the tests? The Judge would disown me. I would never be able to look my grandfather in the eye again. There was no way I could let Mooney copy, even knowing he would kill me when it was over.
Death before dishonor was my family motto.
But that didn’t stop me from being scared spitless. By the end of the week my life was in shambles. I couldn’t eat because my stomach stayed clenched in a tight ball of 32 tension. I couldn’t sleep because when I did, I’d have screaming nightmares. I couldn’t even read because all my energy was focused on my impending demise.
It never occurred to me to seek help. Collins’ weren’t tattletales. Mooney was my problem and I had to take care of him on my own. My family knew something was wrong from my unnatural silence and obvious loss of appetite. At different times, each of them asked me if I was coming down with something. I even avoided Karl that hellish week, although I knew he frowned at me in puzzlement from his post behind Lindsey on the school steps.
The day of the tests dawned bright and sunny, if somewhat chilly. I gave Mama an extra-tight hug goodbye, hoping she wouldn’t cry too much at my funeral, and trudged off to meet my doom.
A small miracle occurred when I reached the school. For the first time ever, Karl left Lindsey and cornered me before I could go inside.
“You ain’t said boo to me in over a week. Are you mad at me for something?”
“No.” I fought hard to hold back the tears threatening to spill over. My teeth were chattering so hard I could barely speak, and nausea turned my stomach in circles. “But you probably shouldn’t plan on marrying me anymore.” With that cryptic statement, I ran into the building, leaving him staring after me.
The trouble started immediately. Mooney glared a warning at me when I took my seat. Mrs. Wade handed out the first test. Swallowing hard, I picked up my pencil and curved my left arm protectively around the paper before I started writing.
Mooney’s foot shot out and hit my calf under the table. Hard. “Move your arm,” he hissed.
“No.” My voice quivered, but I held steady.
“Mooney, Natalie, is there a problem?” Mrs. Wade watched us with an eagle eye.
“No, Ma’am,” Mooney answered before I had a chance. “I just had a cramp in my leg.” He bent over his test as though he were busy being a good little student. But from the corner of his mouth he said, “You’re gonna be sorry, you little bitch.” The rest of that day was a blur to me. I don’t know how I got through it, or actually managed to pass the tests myself. When it was time to go home I lingered in the hall until I had no choice. I had to leave, not knowing when or where the attack would come, only certain that it would happen. I wasn’t going to make it easy for him, though.
I’d fight to my last breath.
But Mooney made a mistake. Apparently he was so enraged by my refusal to give in that he couldn’t wait until I was off the school grounds to attack. I hadn’t even made it to the front sidewalk when someone grabbed my pigtail and threw me to the ground.
My books flew in all directions and the air went out of my lungs with a whoosh.
I never had a chance. Before my screaming lungs could draw another breath, Mooney was on top of me, his ham-like fist swinging. The first one hit my left eye and I saw stars. For a second, everything went black and I didn’t feel the second blow. There 33 was no third because suddenly Karl was there. He ripped Mooney off me and plowed into him with a determination that was fearsome to behold.
Someone screamed. Teachers came running from all directions, grabbing both boys and pulling them apart. Still Karl struggled to reach Mooney. I could vaguely hear Mrs.
Wade, who was kneeling beside me, ask me where I hurt, but I couldn’t answer. All my attention was focused on Karl.
“If you ever touch her again, I’ll kill you,” he snarled.
Mooney, like all bullies, changed his tune when he was on the receiving end. “They started it,” he whined, making sure he stayed out of Karl’s reach. “I wasn’t doing anything.” Blood poured from his nose.
There wasn’t a scratch on Karl, but his shirt was torn and I saw how he protected his right side.
“You stop your lying right now, Mooney Orr,” Mrs. Wade said. “I saw the entire thing. You should be ashamed of yourself, jumping on a little girl like Natalie.” All three of us were hauled to the nurse’s office and our parents called. Karl refused to leave my side, hovering over me protectively until Miss Sams, the nurse, made him stand on the other side of the cot so she could check me for injuries. I had skinned elbows, a busted lip, and a black eye. Karl had a large bruise on his ribs and some raw knuckles. But Mooney had lost two teeth and gained a busted nose.